In the words of Charlie Brown, ug. I've given the script a bit of a rest, taken a break from writing, or thinking about writing, for a few days, which has been kind of fun. Taken a fresh look, and seen my script still has basic problems, especially character arc. I'm going to try and start my character off at a different point and see if that works. She's also not active enough. There's a whole sequence that just sort of happens to her. Got to sort that.
So, here we go again. Change the beginning a bit, to start her off a bit tougher. I've realised that's one thing I usually respond to, and a part of my developing voice: tough, hard "bad" characters with good hearts, who come good under pressure. So I need more of that going on, if I want to tug at the old heartstrings. And then, redo the passive/reactive sequence, and get my character driving things on.
It's hard, but this does represent progress. As I said before, not long ago, I'd have called it good and sent it out. No more. Writing script reports, especially, has forced me to be a much tougher, keener critic of my own work.
4 days ago